121703 #human Nothing. Absolutely nothing. That's what I did with it. I let it die. I let it die. It was blushing and burning, a perfect sunset of opportunity, and I let it spin on into night alone, ashen, growing colder, abandoned, dead. I never went back for it. It's still out there, the teddy bear on the curb in the rotten part of town where the sidewalks' cracks aren't charming. Where Mugger's Alley really is. I never went back there. I let myself be alarmed out of bed before the dream was done, and why? For a job. To satisfy the opinions of some people. To Do the Right Thing. I am an idiot. Not savant. Just an idiot. The real reason I don't kill myself? I don't deserve to die. This computer screams around in circles. Shut it the fuck up.