022501 #human We despise each other some, now. This house together is cold comfort. Lonely apart, yet dreading each others' return. I despise her for her constant anguish and leaden sorrow, and the way she clings to it desperately and the self-loathing that seems inherent in her inability to give in to it or fight it off--she hates me for lying to her about why I did not want to marry her. She thinks it's not because she's a woman. And it is, and it isn't.