112296 #human well, it was like a roller coaster. a swift, gut-sickening, intoxicating acceleration that, once something triggered it--in this case, learning that michelle was a pot smoker and almost certainly had some available--started creeping forward slowly, with a little jolt at the beginning of the ride that reminded me queasily that i was strapped into my seat and there was no way to back out now, and ratcheted up a hill that took forever to climb,me getting more and more nervous as my remaining seconds till the inevitable plummet dwindled, and then it happened, the hump came and i started going down--at which point, i said to myself, okay, i will just enjoy these two women in their house. no problem--a euphoric feeling that lasted about ten seconds, and then i started worrying about everything, and specifically about what terri was thinking about me, and even more specifically about what terri was thinking about my smoking pot because i think it made her sad and then i felt like shit i blew it, and i tried real hard to act normal so she wouldn't think i had checked out and then i tried to not try so hard so she wouldn't think i was a fucking pervert staring at her or something and then i tried not to try any of this shit, but by then i was so stoned i didn't trust myself at all.