Advice to young writers: Go ahead and be Sentimental Dark Depressed Depressing Boring Naive Self-conscious lazy Stupid Selfish Priggish Ostentatious Narcissistic Soft Dull Normal Slow Pointless Useless Pathetic Laughable Awkward Anonymous Wasted Flabby Entitled Grandiose Self-important Cheap Mindless Empty Addicted Whiny Sick Pissed off And dumb. See how far that gets you. (2016)