internet sez: > We often choose to paint ourselves into a corner so that the only choice left is the one we want, or the one that we think we deserve and so we get it without seeming to make a choice. > Think of the people who moan: "I have no choice but to go to work because of the bills!" But you can reduce the bills, choose to live more simply, choose other work. You do have choices, even if some of them require you to do unpleasant things, to renounce something you want now in order to get something you want more later. When you choose to work for long-term happiness, you have stopped being a victim, and that means you are in control. > We start dependent, then we claim independence in adolescence, and then as adults we have the obligation for inter-dependence, working together, making personal sacrifices for the good of the group when that is called for and standing boldly apart when that is called for.