110524 1730870823 trying to nail down the perfect typewriter, computer setup, fountain pen, notebook, car, or whatever--that weird itchy energy that seems to come out of nowhere and hijacks my attention--that’s emotion suppression, and it makes things more heated and not in a good way. It’s obvious (now that it’s obvious) that it’s not really “about” the typewriter, pen, car, etc. Those things are just conveniently there for you to spend money on, to stuff money into to fill the void of whatever you’re trying to avoid or deny or relieve. If the fascist monster does win—what if instead of studying ways to make myself seethe, I tried to make a real, positive difference in a real community? What if I tried to do that regardless of who is winning at any given moment? 1730870900 so next time it happens, STOP. Ask: what is *really* going on here? 111824 My mom hosted 60 Christmases. This year she’s coming to my house. 112224 The milk actual makes the tea sweet; you don’t actual need to add any sugar. Just let the milk and the tea do they thang. 112424 1732457061 the literature of people’s names you’ve heard of is a kind of politics this is not the only literature 112624 1732666252 if you want to know what vonnegut meant by it doesn’t matter how cleverly you say it, it’s what you actually have to say that matters, look no further than a comment thread on a topical article, like for example on ars technica. you’ll see a couple people, max, contributing something you hadn’t thought of or seems based in thought, experience, analysis, etc; and a FLUFFING WATERFALL of taco-bell-ified restatements of “democrats lol” or “trump lol” 112724 1732771723 ALLEN COUNTY PUBLIC LIBRARY - late night restlessness division ACPL 900 Library Plaza • Fort Wayne, IN • 46802 • Greta K. Southard, Director secrets in the alley: nonsense: the only jupiter rain one of my aligns tap with tap senses Earth; i can truly tap tap- trust cold gray ping these days raindrop on the trash my face can lid earth is a grain of salt on some glorious monster's square-cut fry. i am ok with tat. miles of hi-way hypnotize; after struggling to stay awake while driving now i can't sleep so i sit in the motionless van in the driveway; i'm the pungent innards of a waxy flower Maybe if there's beef or rancor or indignation or offense, it's sometimes because ppl are having totally different conversations @ the same time but on the surface it may look like (or our imaginations' needs may fill in the blanks and make us think it looks like) the same conversation. REMEMBER: randomness doesn't look like randomness. i'm mainly grateful that ppl still seem to exist, at least for the moment, at least Someone you love made it home safe: expanding universe A big goofy cat with a gentle soul finds you on the couch, makes himself at home on your lap: campfire, meteor shower Someone who has cared for you, you're learning how to care for: cala lily brite points of rain on the silent still windshield picking up the signal from someone's christmas lights: radio sweetheart giving yourself permission to rise from the bed (can't sleep) and tap out nonsense: poet, mathematician, drummer, coder, idler, noodler, the dumbest sounding things are often truest: i got such a lot of love to give; whoever you are I love you; yes i'm naive & much too old to still think this way, it's not fair, don't i know the world is hard & fucked up & not everything's rosy, yes, nevertheless, I'm still a rose and there's not much i can do about that so, might as well embrace it. hey water me will ya? I'll either prick yr finger or give you something beautifvl (260) 421-1200 • Fax (260) 421-1386 • TDD (260) 421-1302 • www.acpl.info