I’m a failure; I guess I’ll go home now. Nah man, don’t go home yet! We just got here! What are you, some kind of geriatric? Let the world come back into focus Deepest night feels like a morning when you push open the door of a bar and lurch outside Lost dog and cat posters— Make a mental note of an animal you’re never going to see walking around That animal is gone, long lost or dead But note the name, dimensions, color, breed, and then forget. Rusty staples, scraps of old announcements—these are our memories OK, so you suck at darts— And billiards! Fine! But fuck those guys! Or not—listen, dude, I’ll never be so happy as to hear those assholes muffled by the slamming of that heavy oaken door behind us, as we stumble down these steps and I go home. May I remind you, I’m a snapper!? I can’t control myself, remember? I go off! Shit happens, man, and I just happen back! I guarantee, we don’t go home? Life gets more interesting. I gotta piss. So whip it out! Right here, by this trash can! No thanks. Then walk with me, around the block. Look: another bar. At the corner of across and down. Let’s go— OK, but just one drink, and then I’m done. Scout’s honor. Ah, put your phony hand sign down. I’ve known too many scouts to trust that fake salute.